Ask Tiffany: Stay strong or “Dear John”

Dear Tiffany,

How do you sustain a relationship when both you and your partner are graduating and taking jobs in different cities? Is it time to split?

Before you consider taking on long distance, make sure your relationship has an impressive amount of mutual trust, respect and adoration. A long distance relationship isn’t even worth considering if it isn’t built on a strong foundation.

Until the time comes to be separated, just enjoy what you’ve got going. Assuming you’re graduating in May,  you still have more than six months to make a decision. At that time, if you are still debating the opportunity cost of staying with him or her, then you should probably end it. Long distance is only a good decision if you really want to be in the relationship and will find your significant other worth the emotional challenges.

Though obviously not ideal, dating long distance while starting the next chapter of your lives might offer some advantages. You can dedicate most of your time to making new friends, adapting to your new job and living your new life. Through all of these changes, you will have the familiar support of someone who wants to see you succeed.

To sustain your relationship, you should both recognize that it will take lots of maturity, adaptability and an aversion to jealousy. In addition, there also needs to be healthy confidence in yourself, each other and your relationship. Be honest when you ask yourselves if you mutually have what it takes, because few people do. Less necessary but still important: reliable WiFi and a generous cell phone plan.

Tiffany Kuan is a senior majoring in business administration. Her blog advice column, Ask Tiffany, runs every Monday.

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