Ask Hahney: Developing Confidence

Q: What are your pieces of advice for developing confidence?

A: This answer sucks to write but sometimes developing confidence takes time. Very few people are born confident. Confidence doesn’t occur overnight. There will also be days when you feel less confident, days when you feel overconfident, and certainly days when you’re unsure of what confidence even means.

Confidence is something that exudes off of you, and so I think the best piece of advice I can give is to learn how to love yourself, be yourself, and support yourself.

  • Compliment Yourself:  “You’re beautiful today,” “You did well on that test.” Learn to compliment yourself, because we are so hard on ourselves that sometimes we forget to give ourselves credit.
  • Say “Thanks”: Begin the day thinking about what you’re grateful for. Not only will it put a smile on your face but you’ll start to realize that you’re in a great place to do what you want to do.
  • Breathe: Meditate, take long breaths, do yoga… remember to breathe. Take that breath and it’ll make your day feel a little bit smoother.
  • Be a “Yes” Person: Not to drugs or to something illegal, but say “yes” every now and then when someone asks you to do something out of your comfort zone. It’ll take you to new experiences, and it’ll change your perception! Say “yes!”
  • Surround Yourself with Good People: You know, deep down… who is good for you and who is not. Surround yourself with those that love on you, those that share with you their vulnerabilities and those who you’re comfortable being vulnerable around. Vulnerability is not a weakness. In fact, it makes us better people. It makes us stronger and it definitely makes us more confident.
  • Trust Yourself: Know that you know what’s best for you.


Submit your ethical quandaries to and be on the lookout for sage advice from Ask Hahney.