Though our generation is generally open-minded, sex can still be an uncomfortable, cringe-worthy subject for some.
Done right, sex is a safe, healthy, feel-good part of life, yet it is a subject that oftentimes leads to awkward conversations. Sex is the reason we are on this planet, however, and all discussion of the activity should be encouraged.
One of the most important steps in one’s sexual progression, whether a virgin or an expert, is being able to identify and express exactly what you want out of your sex life. Once you know what you like, you can express this to your partner, and both of you can enjoy a healthy and satisfying relationship.
This is the core of Adrian Colesberry’s new book, How To Make Love to Adrian Colesberry, a humorous satire that attempt to broaden our current cultural limitations when it comes to sex. As Colesberry’s website claims, “No one can love you for who you are until you tell them how to love you.” The book is literally a manuscript about how Colesberry wants to be loved. It is written in third person, covering everything from what physical types he looks for to how he wants to be treated in bed. In an effort to share the joy he discovered in expressing his personal tastes with the world, Colesberry created a website, howtomakeloveto.com. The site features an exciting and innovative program that allows you, the bored and sexually curious web user, to write your own book about the one topic you know better than anyone else: yourself.
Choose “Write Your Book” from the website’s top menu bar, and the program begins by asking you some basic questions: what your name is, whether you are a man or a woman or prefer not to be identified in such polarizing terms, and whether you want the book to be written in first person or third.
From there on, the fun truly begins. You are able to write your book as creatively as you please. The introduction to your book is merely a large blank text box in which you can go wild as you express to the world exactly what turns you on and how you wish to pursue and be pursued in the sexual realm. From there on, there are more specific chapters with titles such as “Dating (Your Name)” or “Making Out With (Your Name)” that ask you to answer a series of survey questions to delve into the specifics of what you like. My favorite part of the program is the optional custom story you can add at the end of each chapter; it allows you to make your book even more personal or outrageous.
The entire book-writing process takes as much or as little time as you please, depending on how specific you want to be in your customizing process. At the end, you can choose to publish your book online. Tons of “How to Make Love To” books are stored in the system, and by clicking “Read Stories” on the top menu bar you will be directed to a random chapter in an anonymous user’s book. Reading these stories are half the fun of the website; it is fascinating to see how people describe themselves and what they enjoy in their sex lives.
Surprisingly, the questions are extremely detailed, forcing the creator of the story to evaluate past sexual experiences as well as envision an ideal hook-up. The program may induce several embarrassed giggles on the part of the participant, but I encourage everyone who reads this article to log on and give it a try (just don’t do it during class, please). It is incredibly empowering; upon completion, you will probably feel like the most sexually desirable creature that has ever walked the USC campus. In the very least, you will learn a lot about yourself, which will hopefully allow you to become more comfortable asking for what you want when you next find yourself in a steamy situation. It is important to be able to identify exactly what you like and what makes you squirm and also to be able to express these feelings to your future partners.
Howtomakeloveto.com is your own special guidebook to sex, and I encourage you not to settle for anything less than the fulfillment of all the sexual desires you pinpoint in the writing of your first “book.”
Colesberry’s simple program is a thrilling and amusing way to pass the time, and it is also unquestionably educational. Everyone can benefit from becoming more confident in who they are both inside and outside of the bedroom. We are sexual creatures, and being able to identify exactly what we want will allow us to pursue our sexuality in the safest, healthiest and most exciting way possible. So grab your laptop, get comfortable and prepare to talk about sex for a while.