Remedies for Apartment Realities

You slowly see your friends trickle in over the course of the week as you take your time with unpacking and purchasing items for your new abode. The posters and room decorations seem to burgeon like flowers upon the walls just as you yourself seem to flourish as an independent individual capable of buying your own toilet paper, instant noodles and soap. No longer will you have to brave the mysteries of the public showers or struggle to cook a midnight meal with no more than a microwave. You have made it out of the dorms and into an apartment.

As it’s my first time living in an apartment style space, I have quickly learned two all-too-real realities of living in an apartment: nobody feeds you and nobody cleans your toilet for you.

To remedy the problem of no food, or rather no meals, one can either be proactive or reactive. You can, like one of my roommates, prepare pre-mixed batter for waffles and cook elaborate meals for you and your friends — taking full advantage of the stove and oven. Or, like one of my other roommates, enjoy a simple sandwich and free food on campus, taking full advantage of all the food opportunities outside our actual kitchen. I have chosen to be a hybrid of my roommates, often attending events on campus for the free meal while still fixing a simple salad or fried rice when said events aren’t taking place. My kitchen skills are limited but my parents won’t have to worry about me starving.

There’s really no other way to contain inevitable messiness other than vigilantly cleaning everything yourself. Like the police to a crime scene, you have to be on that spill or stain as soon as the incident occurs. Ready your Bounty paper towels and Mr. Clean sponges, they will be your partners in crime against the dangers of stove massacres and dish pile-ups. Making your bed isn’t always necessary, but when you only brought one cup and one plate to college, your dishes will determine whether you get to eat or drink immediately.

These startling realties of apartment living have, however, quickly become routine. Once you move on from the terror of stoves and toilets, the joys of independence will overshadow the grueling labor of basic household tasks. Food will be in fridge, so long as you buy it, and toilets work, so long as you maintain them. (And if not, put in a work order immediately to avoid waiting a very long week to get a new toilet — I know from experience.)

Happy apartment living!