Buffet Values in the Dating Scene
My first few days at USC I was in awe, stepping foot on a campus that was so surreal and beautiful. But it wasn’t the architecture or the incredibly green landscape; I was joyfully perplexed by all the attractive students here. I felt as if Urban Outfitters’ model database exploded on campus but for security’s sake disguised in Lululemons, dad hats and Ralph Lauren Polo shirts. With the plethora of intelligent and charming students, could this campus be a dating heaven? This is a University full of people with different cultural backgrounds, interests and Instagram feed aesthetics — there’s got to be a multitude of people compatible for a single person. Which made me think: Dating is a lot like being at a Vegas buffet.
Oh, man. Vegas buffets. Endless, gluttonous amounts of delicious noms including the weekly prime rib brunch and seafood buffets. From carving stations to the many featured cuisines, the cherry-on-top is the full dessert bar and an all-you-can-drink beer and wine bar. It’s kind of a hassle to drive off the strip for it, but it’s always worth the little extra effort for the extra nice. Also, averaging from $20-$30, it’s not too bad of a deal. Steep price for a college student meal, but I mean you’ve got to invest a little for a Vegas buffet.
Similarly so, dating begins with agreeing to invest yourself. Yes, we’re all social beings, but putting yourself out there for romantic interests can be incredibly different from creating platonic friendships. Choosing to be in the dating field, whether it be college parties, Tinder or “networking” (that’s for you, Marshall students), requires an investment of time and vulnerability. And why is it not like a HomeTown Buffet with the weekly coupons bargaining out to a total of $5, or maybe a step up at Souplantation? Because choosing to date and to allocate time toward others in romantic pursuits during college or even post-grad can be a steep investment considering the time spent that could be used toward career development or even focusing on the self.
You’re invested — you’re in the buffet. Why are you really there? Whether to satisfy some sort of need, to taste an array of new foods or to go a second round to try out what you may have missed the first time, there’s always a motive. There’s endless cuisines to consume and experience. Some options seem really appealing — you try it, you love it. Maybe you don’t. On the opposite end, maybe you saw something that you weren’t attracted to at first, but once you give it a chance, you’re in love. Someone might even have introduced or suggested the course to you, and without this person you would have never encountered something so fulfilling. Are you catching my drift yet?
Going to buffets is also a mental game. Are you really going to be able to consume all that you really want to consume? Which dishes are you going to prioritize? Identify the things that aren’t good for you — the greasy-looking “Chinese” food or the sad salad bar; are those really worth your health and time? Should you invest the stomach space or time to go out of your way to re-experience something that you’ve had over and over again, especially if you know that it isn’t that great or might even give you stomach pains later. It’s like that ex that you’re keeping tabs on or the fickle cutie that inconsistently texts you — maybe that’s the entrée you shouldn’t return to.
There are definite joys of being at the buffet. You get to know some new courses, you learn what doesn’t work with your palate, maybe you find your new favorite dish. But just remember to not run in and stack plates high with anything and everything — what’s healthy and worth it for you? And at the end of the day, maybe the Vegas buffet isn’t meant for you. We all have different tastes and mentalities when it comes to dating — just don’t let it consume you instead.
Dani Chang is a senior majoring in cinema and media studies. Her column, “Feisty Woman,” runs every other Friday.