THAT’S FASHION, SWEETIE
Reverse engineering a ‘Get ready with me’
How can you fall in love with the process of getting ready, and how does the preparation for a night out translate into real life?
How can you fall in love with the process of getting ready, and how does the preparation for a night out translate into real life?
One activity I miss greatly is ballet. I loved the discipline, the heavy lights, the storytelling — everything about it. But mainly, I loved the process of it. I didn’t mind that the barre portion of class was structurally the same or that I would always have to spend an extra 10 minutes warming up my right hip. I loved that I had a routine and that after each sweaty class, I knew I was getting better.
I still remember lining up at the end of class and waiting for my first pair of pointe shoes. The satin was a pinkish-orange (even though I had hoped to buy the white-lavender pair) and the Chacott shank felt smoother than velvet. I couldn’t wait for pointe class to begin and to start copying my teachers in finding how to best wrap my feet, but I knew that I had to trust that a slow start was the key to longevity.
The beauty of trusting the process is that there is better appreciation for the event itself. Although I stopped dancing upon going to boarding school in ninth grade, I still apply this enjoyment and (am still working on) the practice of enjoying the moment. This may seem pretty intuitive — why wouldn’t you know when you’re enjoying something?
Well, first, I overthink many things, which helps in terms of planning ahead for my academic career, but it often means I tend to sacrifice enjoyment of what’s currently happening to prepare for the future. Secondly, this realization came to me upon a discussion about fulfillment with my roommate, Niki, and our friend Ines. Coming out of my room after getting dressed — and after the wonderful girlhood moment of five minutes of compliments toward one another — I revealed that lately, I have felt incredibly loved and seen in my friendships. Perhaps it is the thrill of coming back and seeing everyone, but especially with missing my friends who left in December, it feels so warm seeing everyone come back as we make group chats and schedule thrifting days.
Going back to loving the process, one particular way I’ve seen this manifest is when I’m getting ready to leave my apartment. Whether this is my morning routine of face masks and a chapter from a book or packing my bag, I have been re-falling in love with the meditation of doing my makeup. Perhaps it is the fun of executing creative visions with your hands (like I tried to do as a child), or getting excited as the full ensemble with the outfit comes together — either way, I love that there is an art to getting yourself physically ready for the day.
Not only does it require intense focus for one, two (or in the case of my first date with my boyfriend, four) hours, but it has to be meticulously planned out. Maybe you do this unconsciously, but even if you don’t and you always feel like you run out of time, let me help you. A fair warning: Some math is involved for the perfect outing look, but I promise it’s very simple.
The Hadyn formula is as follows: Take the time you have to leave, subtract a half hour to an hour depending on if you already have a base on, don’t plan on wearing a lot of makeup or need to do a fresh face; an extra half hour for a face mask; an extra half hour for hair; and give yourself 15 to 30 minutes for photos. And, if the outfit isn’t planned out, subtract another 30 minutes for options and, if you like, for getting second opinions.
You’re probably thinking that the Hadyn formula is absolutely crazy — and you’re right, because it can be excessive. But I promise that this formula isn’t for silently running around and staring at a countdown. Instead, it allows you to comfortably explore and fall in love with the experience of getting ready, and to do that, you need to consider three things.
The first is what energy you want to give. Yes, I know in my last article I said office sirens are in, but I also said that something being trendy doesn’t mean you have to adhere to it. Sometimes, I want to be simple and classic with brands like The Row or Max Mara, and other times I want to give 1960s mod Twiggy eyes and bright colors à la “Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion” (1997). It often depends on the event I’m going to, if I’m mainly standing or sitting, how much walking is involved and who I am actually going with.
Second, you have to consider the kind of evidence you create. Is it a few mirror selfies with the right lighting? Are you meeting up with a group and having to rotate who gets the solo shots? If it’s a trio, you also have to do the rotational duos, too. Where are the photos being taken? Are there multiple locations? Bonus points if you have a digital camera, but that does mean you get the new responsibility of having to be the one to upload and disperse pictures that night. My favorite girlhood moment, too, is after the photos are done when we select favorites for main feeds, the story and any to save for later dumps.
Lastly, and most importantly, what is the aural stimulation, i.e., how are you mentally pregaming the event? Is it a slow morning and you’re going to brunch? I like to go for a light TV show that I don’t need 100% concentration for. Sometimes, I throw on a podcast too — although, despite it being 10 p.m. or 6 a.m., I still like to only listen to podcasts on cybercrime. If it’s a group getting ready for a fun sunset dinner, I like to play music according to what mood I want to foster. Whether it’s moody music for a more quiet evening or phonk pop and 2010s for a party, the mindset for the night starts with when you first stand in front of the mirror.
This prep is incredibly important not only for the weekends to take your mind off of school but also for how you approach anything in life. In a process where success needs to come from mindful consciousness when you commit, the night before, the day of, during and after whatever you are doing, it can feel overwhelming.
But here’s some good news for you! You probably already do most of this — you just don’t realize it yet. Maybe all you’re missing is some conscious music choices or a good hype squad, but still, the first step in any change is recognition. With patience, self-forgiveness and a positive internal feedback loop, hopefully this article can hold your hand in any way that you need — or come find me on campus, and I’ll hype you up any day.
Hadyn Phillips is a junior writing about fashion in the 21st century, specifically spotlighting new trends and popular controversy. Her column, “That’s Fashion, Sweetie,” runs every Wednesday.
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