Start diva-dieting with muffin tops


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Tear open a Nabisco 100-calorie pack, and you get five little crisps that resemble the conveyor belt castoffs of Oreos or Chips Ahoy. Nabisco’s new slogan is “Diet Like a Diva,” and it bears some truth. Chances are you will feel so dissatisfied with these Oreo wafers that you’ll storm off to find a pack of the real thing. To add insult to injury, these shrimpy baggies have no nutritional benefit or anything filling enough to quiet the tummy rumblings.

But at the same time, the concept of the 100-calorie pack enforces portion control, and it’s no secret we are a nation of mindless munchers. For those who count Oreo consumption by the sleeve, consider this alternative: VitaTops, a product created by the New York-based company Vitalicious. For 100 calories, you get fiber, whole grains and the ultimate solution to the midnight sweet tooth.

Just like the muffin-top centric Seinfeld episode, VitaTops are the best part of the muffin packaged independently of its lower counterpart. They come in over a dozen flavors, from traditional BlueBran to sweet and savory Golden Corn and decadent Double Chocolate Dream.

Each VitaTop is only 100 calories but, unlike the Oreo crisps, offer something more than a quick sugar jolt. VitaTops are made with whole grains and have four to seven grams of slow-digesting fiber, which means they will stave off the munchies.

But the whole grains factor is the real winner here. Many foods that are advertised as “healthier alternatives” — such as a number of Newman’s Own products — still use enriched flour, which is devoid of nutritional value. Whole grains are heart-healthy and have fiber, which is good for digestion and keeps you full.

VitaTops are also low in fat and free of trans fat or cholesterol. Additionally, VitaTops are fortified with vitamins and minerals such as B vitamins, zinc and iron. Granted, vitamins are better absorbed from whole foods, but it’s still better than a bag of Fritos.

Instead of Nabisco’s 100-calorie yogurt-covered Nibbles, which taste nothing like real yogurt-doused pretzels, VitaTops are real muffin tops, albeit ones made with decent ingredients. No cardboard diet-food taste and no watered-down cakey hybrid — just an improvement upon Elaine from Seinfeld’s million-dollar business idea.

Because VitaTops are made without preservatives, they are mailed in ice. VitaTops must stay in the freezer or be consumed within five days. That leaves three dining options — microwaved, toasted or frozen. Actually, they taste good all three ways, though the traditional muffin flavors like CranBran and AppleBerry benefit from heat and toasting gives them a nice crunchy exterior. The chocolate flavors are great frozen.

After trying every flavor, I could not pick a favorite. The Golden Corn VitaTop tastes fantastic with chili or butter. The traditional bran and fruit ones go well with jam, nut butter or cream cheese — or marmite, if you happen to be British. The chocolate flavors, which include Banana Fudge and Chocolate Mint, taste great any way you like your chocolate. My favorite variation was a chocolate VitaTop slathered in peanut butter.

There are many opportune moments to eat a VitaTop. They work as part of breakfast, as a snack and especially as a dessert. I like to crumble one over a bowl of Greek yogurt. Add in some nuts and berries, and it’s a party in a bowl. At just 100 calories, VitaTops are small, but Vitalicious makes them satisfactory for taste, not just some silly notion of “guilt free.”

If your interest is piqued, there are two ways to get your muffin top on. VitaTops are sold in stores, though in limited distribution. Alternatively, you can order them online. The website has frequent sales and membership specials, so there are many ways to get them for less.

In addition to VitaTops, Vitalicious also makes 100 calorie VitaBrownies, which are a great way to satisfy a brownie craving, as well as VitaMuffins (twice as big as a VitaTop) or Vita cake mix. The website even has customer-submitted recipes.

VitaTops are a great fix when you want something sweet but don’t want the whole cake or know you would not be able to stop at one slice. Unless you attack the box, your sweet treat ends at 100 calories and a shot of fiber — not too bad for a muffin top.

According to Nabisco, dieting like a diva means settling for unsatisfying little crispies — just another example of why diets are goofy. Skip the diet and try a Fudgy Peanut Butter VitaTop. You will feel much more like a smug little diva.

Mimi Honeycutt is a sophomore majoring in print journalism. Her column “Gingersnaps” runs Wednesdays.