Please create your bonfires outside the building


There are many reasons to be scared about leaving USC housing and fending for yourself in the scary world of independently owned property. Bed bugs! Long bike rides to campus! Mysterious landlords! The inability to instantly access the candy and condoms bucket!

But conversely, there are many reasons to be excited about leaving the protective bubble of the University-own residence halls and apartments. No obligation to eat at EVK! Mysterious landlords! No one to tease you for accessing the candy and condoms bucket!

By far the biggest advantage of getting a non campus owned place though, is the notable absence of fire drills.

The problem with living in close proximity to 500 other college students is that every other night, one of them will inevitably put a metal dish in the microwave, or light aroma therapy candles next to a stack of Daily Trojans or attempt to barbecue their hamburgers in their living room. At one in the morning.

And then the entire building evacuates to the street, hoping for a glimpse at the indescribably stupid culprit responsible for waking them up. Or at least for a glimpse at someone who jumped out of the shower and is standing around in their towel.

Based on anecdotal experience, Troy Hall and Troy East have experienced this problem twice in the last week. Residents there should be advised to take advantage of the candy and condoms bucket while they still can. And to lay of the aroma therapy.