Ryan Seacrest helps USC sorority member find invite date


Just when you thought that the inauguration of President C. L. Max Nikias would bring an air of social and academic responsibility to our party-dome campus, a member of Pi Beta Phi sorority has decided to continue one of ‘SC’s stereotypes.

She has gone from simple college girl to national celebrity in a matter of minutes because of one email with the ever-present Ryan Seacrest.

It all started when she took out a Craigslist ad trying to find a date for her sorority’s annual Beauxs and Arrows invite. Her boyfriend, who according to her is a “hot douche,” dumped her a few days before the invite, leaving her dateless.

Seacrest decided he would fix her up with Derek Hough, a Dancing with the Stars champion and coincidently the brother of Seacrest’s girlfriend Julianne.

The student decided to get even because her ex-boyfriend “is a prominent person around campus, and I know no better way than to take [Derek] then to get back at him!”

She says that her date needs to “definitely over 6 feet (do not include height from hair), steamy and athletic build (6 pack highly preferred), sharp and classic fashion sense (absolutely no bow tie aficionados – think Clooney).”

Many have laughed along with her idea, saying that it means she has a fantastic sense of humor. But does no one see the larger picture? The sooner we give into people with materialistic and unrealistic ideals of beauty, the sooner the world stays in a stagnated place where beauty reigns all.

USC is a very “physical” campus. You will find people working out in the gym at all hours of the night, girls spending hours to put on make up and guys not eating carbs in order to “bulk up.”

Unlike James Franco’s series Undergrads, this is real. Although some have had their problems with the webseries, the fact that it knows it’s fictional is decent enough. But when stuff like this happens in real life, it’s no laughing matter.

3 replies
  1. usc student
    usc student says:

    you’ve got to be kidding me with this article… the entire craiglist ad was a COMPLETE JOKE .. it’s not her fault it happened to get her famous. people need to calm down and have a sense of humor once in a while. you’re probably just jealous of her. i completely agree with alex’s comment above.

    also- you should proofread your articles before you publish them… “She says that her date needs to “definitely over 6 feet” ?

  2. Alex
    Alex says:

    This was clearly meant to be humorous, stop taking things so literally and trying to spin them. This is simply nothing more than having a great sense of humor — there is no larger picture to be seen. You’re in the Greek system and I bet you wouldn’t have written this if the girl would’ve been in your sorority. Furthermore, is it really a bad thing that “USC” is a physical campus? Since when is staying in shape something to be ashamed of?

Comments are closed.