SheRatesDogs shows the power of public humiliation

Like many people my age, my screen time every day is abysmally high. I spend too much of my free time on my phone and on social media — especially Twitter. With over half a million followers, an account I see regularly in my feed is SheRatesDogs, a popular anonymous submissions-based page. The title of the page is a play on the more popular page WeRateDogs, another submissions-based account instead devoted to positively uplifting canines of the world, in the format of a photo, short blurb and rating of 11/10 at the least. However, the SheRatesDogs page is an entirely different online community. 

All men are dogs — some are good and some are bad. Or at least that’s what my mom always liked to tell me when I would complain about jerks at school or my dating woes. SheRatesDogs seems to subscribe to a similar philosophy, using the platform to criticize the ridiculous and awful words of the “bad dogs” in the world. As stated in the account’s bio, “the dogs are your exes/someone’s exes.” The page is a public record of the normalized verbal harassment women face from men online — whether it be from former partners, potential connections or complete strangers. 

Many posts feature men becoming hostile after facing rejection or not getting a response. Instead of taking no for an answer, they spew out hate and abuse to those who truly do not deserve it. 

Through commiseration and humor, SheRatesDogs exposes the violence of misogyny in heterosexual dating app and online culture. Emboldened behind a phone screen rather than face-to-face communication, the verbal assault heterosexual men are willing to inflict upon their potential romantic and sexual interests is beyond frightening. The only technique we have left to deal with it is to laugh at them as a coping mechanism. The entitlement many men feel over women and their bodies is so ridiculous that it’s hard not to laugh at them. But the language used is rather frightening. It’s vulgar, violent and most importantly, completely unwarranted and unprovoked. 

Beyond outright verbal abuse, many other instances reveal men who continue to pursue a past romantic interest despite treating them unfairly. In looking over these posts, how are these men so bold as to be caught cheating or lying, and still try to make a comeback from such a major betrayal without making proper amends? They somehow have the audacity to do this over text or Instagram DM too. 

The account as a whole is a deep dive into heterosexual male entitlement. They feel entitled to women, to kindness, to forgiveness, to love. Our patriarchal culture has created these monsters, these men who place so little value on the humanity and emotions of women that they feel as if they can say anything to them. 

The account’s popularity demonstrates that this is not just a small group of men — it is a widespread problem that far too many have unfortunately faced. Luckily, in the comments section, you can find a community of shared lamenters, validators, allies, friends and people who have experienced similar instances — or at least have the humanity to recognize that these messages are disgusting, unacceptable and utterly appalling. 

Gendered verbal online abuse has become largely normalized in recent years, and the online abuse is reflective of women’s reality. The cruel reality of the world is that one in six American women have survived either an attempted or completed rape, with 90% of American rape victims being women. SheRatesDogs simply exposes a symptom of the problem — the dehumanization of women so many men participate in without a second thought. 

But all is not lost. While men continue to perpetuate the heteronormative patriarchal side of society with their audacity, women will continue to combat it with our boundaries. No one deserves to be berated and belittled because a relationship didn’t work out, but it doesn’t stop people from doing so. Luckily, there will always be that block button and in more serious cases, remember that all dating apps have some form of a report function. Despite the hostility and vitriol, at the end of the day we still have the ability to laugh at these men’s audaciousness, because sometimes laughing is better than crying. But above all, while you might not have the power to stop men from being dogs, you have the power to walk away and starve them of the attention all dogs seem to crave. And if that doesn’t work, let SheRatesDogs do the work of calling them out.