Parents weekend approaches! Turn off your cell phone.

It seemed like such a good idea in August. You didn’t have too much work for class. You were fresh of a relaxing family vaction.  Of course you’ll want to see your parents in October. Parents weekend! Perfect!

But now it’s two days away and all of a sudden tailgating with Mom and Dad does not seem as fun as it did. Plus you have midterms and papers and projects and booty calls— there’s just not enough time.

And on top of all that, your mom is texting you every four minutes to confirm their estimated time of arrival, and to make sure you made reservations and to confirm “the Vagabond Inn isn’t that bad, is it?”

Yes, it can all be a bit overwhelming. But remember why you really wanted them here in the first place: to show off! To dazzle them with your newfound independence and self-sufficiency! To remind them why they agreed to let you move a thousand miles away from home and live with a bunch of glorified teenagers!

And once you’re done showing them how responsible and independent you are, they can take you to Costco to buy food. Because really, Lucky Charms is not an acceptable dinner food.