The Carpool Lane: Check yourself before your wreck yourself, literally
The name “City of Angels” becomes particularly ironic once you take to the roads as a driver for the first time, or even just observe from the passenger seat. Los Angeles, a city known for its car and driving culture, almost seems to be in total spite of it. The roads, already plagued with potholes and an unforgiving lack of protected left turns, are filled with short-tempered and egotistical drivers. With this comes the occasional driving incident fueled by some neurological or chemical thing in the mind simply called “road rage.”
Road rage can be described as “aggressive driving … like tailgating, weaving and speeding,” according to that green gecko that runs Geico.
Personally speaking, I believe this form of anger can be derived from a person who decides to forget everything they learned in driving school. However, road rage can come from a generally poor day, traffic delays, resentment of the law or pure disregard for other people.
For those who don’t drive, think of that time when the venom symbiote takes over Tobey Maguire in “Spider-Man 3,” when Peter Parker suddenly becomes a real asshole.
Your foot slowly begins to press further down on the pedal and your grip on the wheel becomes tighter. Your eyes begin blitzing back and forth from mirror to mirror to see where to accelerate toward. The hunkering piece of metal and wires that was once your car becomes a wrecking ball coming ever so close to destruction. The commute transforms into a pursuit of something greater than simply getting from point A to point B — now it’s a test challenging your pride.
It’s a real, incredibly frightening state of being that is anything but homeostasis.
But, more importantly, this mindset presents a clear and immediate danger to others on the road. Whether we would like to admit it or not, we begin to act irrationally — overreacting to other drivers’ subtle mistakes that we’ve also made before.
Road rage and reckless driving, which is usually what road rage is constituted as under law, often go hand-in-hand. A person who would rather piss in their bathroom than in the comfort of their own car may begin to drive recklessly, something that may progress to road rage if they encounter traffic or stoppages on the road.
You’re making your way en route to the University when suddenly, another driver zips into your lane, almost dinging your car. You swerve, slam your hand on the horn and get back to your senses. Unscathed physically but angered emotionally, you continue your commute.
Poof! Two tiny beings pop on your shoulders, and you are presented with two options, of which I will denote as Lewis and Lois — my personal alter egos carried over from “Back in My Day.”
Lewis urges you to really tap into that anger, derived from a terrible day in class, a bad conversation with a friend or running into an ex. Simply said, floor it. Get in front; brake check them. Then, weave through lanes like your grandmother knitting you a sweater for Christmas as you hightail it out of there.
Lois sits you down for that sort of fatherly chat, insisting you think of what that person might be going through. Patience is a virtue, albeit not commonly practiced, but still one nonetheless. Take it slow a bit, catch your breath, maybe play some tunes to get you back in the right mood.
That’s not to say we’re always perfect, either. Drivers eventually succumb to the Lewis within and take the figurative low road. Honestly, that’s OK.
However, from a more existential perspective, I, Lois, implore you to think about who or what you make the commute for. Remember the people that you might’ve shared a ride with, the moments of joy and pure euphoria derived from experiences in your car and the people, pets or space waiting for you once you park and get out of the car. I remember the times I spent with my friends in my car. Those recollections of gossip or fun conversation keep me sane and also keep my foot from pressing too hard on the accelerator. Remember, there’s a lot more to life than being able to salvage your pride after someone cuts you off.
Commute safely, besties.
Lois Angelo is a junior writing about the perks, downsides and necessities of the commuter lifestyle in his column, “The Carpool Lane.” He is also the managing editor at the Daily Trojan.